It's true that Thai men never seen cleavages all their lives.
You see, I was walking with two prettier girls, but no men look at them, in fact, they turned around, kept having their eyes on my humble cleavage!
... and it's not that big nor visible for crying out loud!
For this, we can conclude that looks aren't important for men, cleavages are.
I did not notice until my friend, Lanyin, told me so!
She said, "wow, do you know how many men are looking at you?!"
I got all excited, but I couldn't believe it, I was pretty convinced that my friends are prettier.
Then I realised, wow, yes, men WERE looking at me, not my face, but my almost-invisible cleavage.
If you have seen me in real life you would know that I don't bear my chest the way Pamela Anderson does.
Okay, so let's start with my trip.
Lanyin brought along her best friend, Situ Biyi (Chinese). She's really beautiful, she kinda looks like the crossover of Kristin Scott Thomas and Bryce Dallas Howard.
She's like the candy to the eyes, don't you agree with me?
We had so much expectations for Hat Yai, we were told it's the heaven for shopping and we all know Thailand is the heaven for night clubs!
.... but it turned out to be.. shit!
First we were brought to Nora Plaza and we had bird's nest soup there. I had some before, but in Thailand it's a lot cheaper than it should cost in Malaysia, only 200 baht.
Wow, so many different flavours available, coconuts, ginseng, etc etc. We made our orders and it came and we realised, the only flavour available is "syrup"! So bloody sweet we had to swallow the whole bowl!
After that, we checked in to our hotel, finally! I need a shower!!
Then we were brought to this massage place.
You know, usually you get naked being massaged, they cover your areas with a towel and it's supposed to look classy, just like those stock images!
But no, they gave us three sets of cartoon PJs asking us to bloody change into them.
My dad once told me a story of his friend, when he was getting his Thai massage, he felt like he needed to, ahem, defecate during the massage session, oh he was trying his best to hold it back...
Unfortunately, at one moment she pressed too hard, and he just... he just....
So that story taught me a lesson, always go to a massage session with an empty bladder, or rectum, whatever!
Then I asked her where the washroom is...
I said "toi-let", really really slowly, but she still couldn't understand.
Instead, she asked me to take my jeans off, with a hand gesture.
So we talked chickly and duckly after awhile I decided to do a hand-washing gesture, then she went, "oohhhh" and showed me where the washroom is!
When you are somewhere where people don't speak English nor your language, you are screwed!
I heard they speak a little Mandarin and Hokkien, even though I speak both those languages, I felt like I am more comfortable with English, it's more universal.
So okay, we changed into the PJs they provided, and the session started.
Three of us in a room, three masseuses, rubbing us here and there.
I did not like it, they were not as professional as we thought they would be.
First of all, they kept chit-chatting while rubbing us; second of all, they kept watching the tv.
Lanyin was apparently more ticklish than I would she was, as she kept laughing when her masseuse was rubbing her.
Oh, thank you, now she made me ticklish!
It was a little painful, but we did not feel THAT good, relaxed or whatever after the massage like they said we would.
After the massage we went to the supermarket, as the stuffs there are supposed to be inexpensive and of good quality.
... but NOT!!
It's bloody expensive and we could've purchased the same thing in Malaysia with almost the same rate!
Then we took a taxi that's called the "tut-tut car" in Hat Yai to go to the market, they said it's a must-go as the stuffs there are inexpensive and nice!
Ok, we still had our expectations and we did not want to rush into buying nice stuffs, same like two people wouldn't want to rush into sex when they first started dating, you know..
So we stopped off for some food and drinks first!
We first had this "egg cake" which is pretty delicious, then we tried this coconut drink, something, I absolutely hate it!
Then we tried this bird eggs.. Now that's what I call, nice food! It bloomed in your mouth, like a beautiful flower...
We should've known that the stuffs in the market are crap and they only suit old aunties with horrible fashion taste, as the clothes there are incredibly cheap, like something a low-class Asian prostitute would wear. Of course, the price wouldn't be so high with that design!!
I was looking for underwear, nice underwear, but not something a prostitute would wear!
Now we did not expect that, we were really disappointed!
We went back to our hotel a little earlier than we expected, not much to shop about :(
If we changed our mind we could still catch the "ah-gua show" (she-males).
We decided that we would drop our stuffs in the room first, then went out shopping again before dinner, then we would wait for John to come back from the show and we would all go clubbing together.
I brought along a very sexy dress for that!!
The night view was wonderful, though we were tired, we had fun looking at the city and we enjoyed one another's companies.
It was wonderful shopping, but the dinner was horrible, dirty and horrible, in fact!
Then we came to this stall with a lot of fried stuffs like chicken, birds, crabs, prawns etc etc..
It looked incredibly yummy!!
I MUST eat them!
As they turned out to be incredibly delicious, just like they looked.
It was a shame we did not see John after the show therefore we did not go to a club or a pub, we did not see any exciting ones anyway.
The next morning, while waiting to leave the place, we, as the camwhores took some snaps.
The tour-guide must've told the other bus the wrong time as we spent like 40 minutes waiting for the rest of the team!
It was annoying, while waiting, the Malaysian tour-guide told us the Thai tour-guide was leaving therefore she asked us to give a little "happy money"!
Funny how people name money with whatever adjectives, I thought money is always happy!
We were stunned, like he did not earn enough commission from the massage session, the she-male show and those shops he took us to!
Okay, we were embarrassed not to give anything, therefore we gave very little money, like 2 bucks.
He sang a song for us anyway.
The tour-guides should stop being so cunning!!
After we checked out at the custom, we snapped a picture.
An annoying aunty aka colleague was in the picture too, you see the front red spirit beside Lanyin? She's it. No no, not the one at the back!
I had to crop her out of it.
The Thailand trip was fun, though disappointing.
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